PUDDNHEAD

Change and rate of change matter more than absolute value.

By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes. Open, locks, whoever knocks!

Why use one code quality tool when 10 will do the same job 10 times slower and at 10 times the cost?

Step 10: Eat pizza

Downtown Seattle looks like a zombie apocalypse. Bubblegum alley is deserted. The Amazon spheres sit empty.

A baby punishes the corrupt with illness. A plague of levitation sweeps the planet. The jinnia declare a sex boycott against the djinn.

I say "our" Twins, but I no longer live in Minneapolis. Now I'm just from there.

I guess I'm coming around to the idea that people who have done horrible things are still worthy of compassion.

Which makes it easier to find a bar showing American football, but also easier to find a douchey American who watches American football.

So I recommend Lima to the construction worker community.

I sat at the bar and got stupid drunk drinking mezcal and Modelos with a gorgeous dental student from Juarez.

My typical passive aggressive cold shoulder slip out the backdoor approach to romance.

The karaoke slips at the bar had checkboxes for sing, dance, or listen.

There were also some guy wrestlers, a villainous official, and a commentator who said "señoras y señores" every 3 seconds.

I saw several blind people in the cemetery selling prayers.

I spent 2 hours standing in freezing water while everybody else took 1,000 pictures.

I rented a car in Antofagasta and drove an hour and a half into the desert to see a giant hand sculpture.

...but in lieu of that she opted for cupping her breasts and pushing them towards me. You want? Yes?

The AirBnB had been listed as an "entire apartment," but the second morning I woke up to a woman in the kitchen.

My stories about contracting scabies and puking at the airport didn't go over so well.