Andrea

Lima, Peru

In Lima I met a woman named Andrea. She was a copywriter and an Amazon 3rd party saleswoman. She was also smoking hot. And a vegan.

Andrea had a month left at her copywriting job and then she was off to an Amazon convention in Washington D.C. and then 6 months of selfies in Europe. Which left us five weeks to go on coffee toast and avocado dates and watch as much Game of Thrones as possible.

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When people ask me what was my favorite country in Latin America I always say Peru. The food there is incredible. Guinea pig I can do without but I quickly became addicted to ceviche and other fresh fish dishes.

The weather in Lima is just about perfect. It's always 70 degrees and it never rains. It is usually overcast and gray, but my friend Steve tells me that is a construction worker's dream. So I recommend Lima to the construction worker community.

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The only places in Peru I visited besides Lima were Cusco and Aquas Calientes en route to Machu Picchu. I was pretty tired of being a tourist and probably the least enthusiastic visitor to Machu Picchu ever, but I still had a decent time there.

Macchu Picchu is an ancient Incan city that the Spanish conquistadors never found and looted and filled with Jesuses. It's at the top of a mountain surrounded by other mountains and is home to a dozen llamas.

I spent my day at the site hanging out with a couple young Danes with playful senses of humor. When I asked one of them how they supposed the Incans built this wall on the side of a cliff she responded, "probably starting at the bottom."

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The truth is though that I barely explored Peru at all and mostly just hung out in Lima playing poker, drinking beers, and going on dates with Andrea.

We went to a screening of I, Tonya, which was awesome. We walked along the boardwalk and then laid in the grass on a cliff above the ocean, which was awesome.

She was intelligent, funny, beautiful, and conscientious. Mostly I liked Peru the best because of her.

When she left for Europe it was sad. We met up in the middle of the night at a park that had lights in the grass depicting the Nazca Lines. I gave her a flash drive full of Game of Thrones and Firefly and she gave me a Kurt Vonnegut book with a sweet inscription.

The day after she left, I flew back to Colombia. No point staying in a Peru without Andrea.